Hello again, out there in psst! Land,
it's Mona!
I've received many questions from
troubled, frustrated, confused or otherwise perplexed men and
women since my first column. So I've decided to offer my goddess wizzdom
on a topic, covering a multitude of problems. It's called intimacy. I'm
talking about emotional intimacy, not sexual. Even frogs can copulate!
I know the mere mention of emotional
intimacy sends shudders up and down the spines of men ... and even some
women. But, let's take a closer look and de-mystify this very scary
idea.
Everyone, consciously or otherwise, wants
to love and be loved. They also want to know and be known. We ALL want
to be known for who we truly are, deep inside, and be loved and accepted
for who we are ... warts and all! Who better to know us than our
"intimate partner?" In fact, we can't really have an intimate
partner without revealing who we are. Now there's an oxymoron. Inherent
in being known is the act of "allowing" another to know us.
How do we do that? We REVEAL. This requires the willingness to be
vulnerable. To risk emotionally. But what do you really have without
risking? Absolutely nothing. (Nothing ventured, nothing gained?)
Oh, you may think you're say and coy, all
alone in your smug little closed-off world. But you're just cowardly
going through the paces of life, trying to protect yourself. How dull.
Be an emotional adventurer! Adopt this
attitude and you'll be well on your way to creating an open, honest
MEANINGFUL intimate relationship with another. Think of it this way:
"The more I conceal, the sicker I feel. The more I reveal, the
quicker I heal."
We've all been hurt in love. And we all
require healing... it's the human condition. So allow ONE other person
to really know you. Be authentic. Be real. RISK. To do otherwise is to
live a fearful, inauthentic, lonely emotional existence.
Here's to intimate relating!!
Send Mona your most plaguing questions
on intimacy, relationship, love or sex issues at mltplemona@aol.com
